A Sweet Proposal Story Involving Bride’s 3 Year Old Daughter

On Saturday, I told this sweet proposal story to 175 guests.

How did Travis propose to Elizabeth?

She knew it was coming — they had looked at rings together — but not when. The center diamond is the stone her dad gave her mom the day Elizabeth was born, to be hers one day.

April 2009, Travis buys the ring and hides it in his room. He is normally terrible at keeping secrets.

June — two months later — they both plan a trip to South Haven, Michigan. The three of them go — they rent a cottage on the lake. His plan is to propose at sunset on the beach.

After a full day of swimming, they are all yawning. At 6:00pm, Gracyn (the 3 year old daughter of the bride) says, “I want to go to bed.” She has never said those words since.

He looks online — the sunset is at 9:51pm (Michigan is in the Eastern time zone). He wasn’t going to stay awake that long. He wants Gracyn to be there for the proposal. The next day, other family members were going to come.

Earlier in the day, coins had fallen out of his pocket when he was lying on the floor. Gracyn picks them up, calls them her treasure and plays with them.

So, now, he says, “Gracyn, I’ve found another piece of treasure.” She puts her hands out. The coins are in it. He puts the ring in her hand. She gets wide-eyed. She closes her hands and walks over to her mother. Gracyn knows exactly what is going on.

Elizabeth is in the living room — but oblivious. He whispers to her, “Go give it to mommy.” Elizabeth is only a few feet away, watching TV. She doesn’t hear their interaction.

Gracyn walks over and puts just the ring on her mom’s stomach. Elizabeth turns to Travis and says, “What is this?!” Then he gets down on one knee. He says a few words. He ends with “Will you marry me?”

She says yes and starts to cry.

“Mommy, why are you crying?”

“I’m happy. Travis is going to marry us.”

I got choked up telling it. And I had written the story.

While I am telling this story, Gracyn, the girl of honor, now 4,  is standing a few feet away from me.  For some of the wedding she is standing between the matron of honor and me. Some of the time she is standing next to her mom, the bride. Some of the time, she is sitting in the first row next to her grandparents. Regardless, she is adorable.

Gracyn participated in the unity sand ceremony too, pouring her color on top of her mother’s.

The wedding was at the historic Lily Reid Holt Memorial Chapel on the campus of Lake Forest College. There are Tiffany stained glass windows and ceiling lights. Faye Kelly, Director of Special Events, is there for the entire rehearsal and ceremony — a rare thing for a person in that role. It really helps the couple, it really helps me. She’s great.

Best Man Got Them Together, Maid of Honor Made the Proposal Special

Ever wonder who to have as the best man or the maid/matron of honor? One clue — they figure prominently in your love story.  Enjoy this love story I shared with 300 guests last weekend.

How did Amanda and Sean’s love story begin?

The met May of 2006. Kevin, the best man and the groom’s brother, owned an Italian restaurant in the northwest suburbs.

She got hired as the phone girl.

There was an art fair in Park Ridge — the restaurant sold pizza by the slice. Sean worked at the event. So did Amanda. It was really hot — 100 degrees and humid.

HER 1^st impression — oh, Kevin’s little brother. HIS 1^st impression — oh, the phone girl.

They exchange phone numbers that day — but with NO romantic intentions. They become friends.  She thinks he is too young. He thinks she is too old.

One night, they’re with a group of friends at Nick’s Pub. It’s for her 25^th birthday. He lies and says he is not coming home from college for the party. When he shows up, she is surprised — in a good way.

SHE kisses him that evening. But nothing changes between them — for 8 months.

May 2007 — a year after they first meet. He comes home from college for the summer. They spend lots of time together, constantly.

One night, at a bar, they start joking around. “You don’t really want to date me,” she says. “Yea, I do,” he replies. She is floored — she had no idea. Then he leaves — on a family vacation, for a week.

They have been dating ever since.

How did Sean propose to Amanda?

It was June 28, 2009. She had no idea the proposal was coming.

Her grandfather was in declining health. On Sunday, Grandpa is put in hospice.

On Monday, Sean takes her out to dinner. She thought it was to cheer her up. She picked the place — Eliott’s. She got crab legs.

She did not notice if he was acting different or not. He’s stalling for time. They have dinner. And dessert. Then he orders another beer. That did seem odd to her — but she was still clueless. He needs one hour. The hour has passed.

They go home. They come in the back door. Tealight candles line the back hallway. She starts to panic. In the kitchen, champagne and roses are on one counter. More candles are on another counter. On the kitchen table is an 8×10 photo of them. There are more candles around that.

This was all set up by Diana, the maid of honor, in one hour. He had drawn up a diagram — but he had put it in his bag, she could not find it. Sean says she did a better job than he drew up. Tom, her boyfriend, helped her.

In the kitchen, Sean gets down on one knee. He holds the ring box — closed and upside down! He has a speech prepared — but he’s too nervous to say it. “I love you more than you can imagine. “Will you marry me?” Immediately, she says “Yes”.  Then she snatches the ring — and puts it on herself.

As you can imagine, there was a lot of laughter by their guests. (I get that all the time.)

This was shared indoors — it was supposed to be outdoors but 30 minutes before the ceremony began it rained hard with strong winds — at the Westin Chicago Northwest in Itasca with the wonderful Susan Johnson arranging it all.

The couple was kind enough to invite me to stay for the reception and sit at the bride’s parent’s table. It was a lot of fun.

Toasts & YouTube (NY Times)

Best Men, Maids/Matrons of Honor, feeling pressure abour your toast? YouTube just raised the bar — and that is probably not a good thing.

The New York Times recently did a story that opens:

WEDDING toasts can be witty or raunchy. They can be shouted, mumbled or slurred. They can make guests laugh, cry or yawn. But in a video democracy in which guests are often armed with sophisticated cameras, toasts are becoming more like scripted performances.

I think a good toast is a story about the bride or the groom — something funny and/or warm but not too over the top. Nothing sexual. A story from when they were younger often works well. Follow that with your best wishes for the couple — be specific. Then be sure to actually propose a toast — all the guests have a champagne glass in their hand.

You can write it out (I use a script for the wedding ceremony). If it’s more than one page, staple it together. That way, if you accidentally drop it, it stays in the right order.

A one minute toast is sufficient. It’s about being genuine — not doing show tunes, dance routines or being a comic. Leave the YouTube videos to others — be yourself. There is a reason you were chosen to be the Maid/Matron of Honor or Best Man. Let that love show through.

You can read the entire New York Times article, with links.