He Proposes. She Swears at Him. And Says “Yes”.

How did Joe propose to Rachel?

She knows it is coming — they had talked about it. But he had put her off — “I  don’t have money for a ring.”

May 31, 2008. He plans to take her out to dinner. He tells her to dress up. She’s late, an hour late — as per usual. He’s panicking. He has a carriage ride set up on Michigan Ave. She has ridden horses her whole life — he wants to wow her.

They have a QUICK dinner at a different place than he first planned. They head towards Chicago. She is now suspicious.

They park by the Water Tower. As they approach the carriage, she sees roses and champagne. Then she KNOWS — and says to Joe, “Are you doing what I think you’re doing?”

He says, “Baby, I was going to do it but I FORGOT the ring because we were in such a rush. She believes him! She is mad. She looks like the world came crashing down. She says to him, “Don’t do it if you don’t have the ring. “Nothing ever works out for me.”

It’s a one hour carriage ride. 35 minutes go by. She’s still sad, not talking the whole time, giving him dirty looks. The carriage ride does a U-turn. She finally says something, “What are they doing?” He replies, “I don’t know.” “Probably just turning back,” she says.

The carriage ride stops in front of a garden. He gets out. “C’mon,” he says to her. “If you don’t have the ring, don’t do it,” she says again. She really thought he did NOT have it. He actually got FAKE tears to come down his cheeks.

They get under a gazebo. “You know, baby, I might not be perfect…” He gets down on one knee. She is even madder — she TOLD him not to. He pulls the ring out of his sock. “I love you more than anything.” Not until he holds the ring in front of her does she see it.

“Will you marry me?” She responds the way every guy hopes — she SWEARS at him! She is even madder! “Is that a yes?” THEN, she said “Yes” NOW, she thinks it’s funny.

The guests loved hearing me tell their story at Cantigny in Wheaton.  Several people tell me later, “That sounds so much like Rachel.”

Cantigny is so beautiful that there were many other newly married couples getting their photo taken there — although their wedding and reception were elsewhere. Rachel and Joe had the ceremony, photos and reception all at one place.

Those Funny Little People — Reception Entertainment

“Mobile puppet characters with polished peformances that are a mix of comedy, music, dance and audience intereaction” is how the brochure describes Those Funny Little People.

I call the bride and groom — invited wedding reception crashers — amusing and funny. The dances are very well choreographed. The lips really move to the words of the song — and smooch people at the reception. It was fun and funny.

I’ve never seen them at a reception before. The groom’s parents did this as a surprise gift. It came after dinner as a kickoff to an evening of dancing. It worked.

Later, someone mentioned that it must be odd being in the costume for everyone looks at your belly button area (for that’s where the face of the character is; the actor looks out through an opening in the hat).

This happened at the reception for Rachel and Joe in Wheaton at Cantigny’s new banquet hall — opened just this year. Large windows overlook the scenic park. High ceilings make for an open feel. Cantigny does all their own cooking and baking on the premises. It was an especially moist and delicious marble cake.

Flowers for Moms — the Same Kind She Had at Her Wedding

Giving a flower to the mothers during the ceremony is a low cost way to honor the moms. This is in addition to the corsages given before the ceremony.

If both parents are still married to each — which, sadly, is rare — I will point out how long they have been married to each other. Sometimes, the guests will applaud that. They should.

Rachel (whose parents have been married for 31 years) and Joe (whose parents have been married for 27 years) did something I’ve never seen before — they gave their moms flowers that matched what they had at her wedding decades ago! They looked up old photos and matched the type of flower. Sweet!

Rachel and Joe got married on the grounds of Cantigny in Wheaton. The reception was there, too. Everyone calls it “Can-tig-nee” but it’s French and should be called “Can-tee-nee”. Either way, it’s a beautiful place.

Vows: “For better, for better”

Ryan, please share these vows and truths to Christina, repeating each phrase after me.

He repeated after me the lines of the standard vows:

• “To have and to hold,”
• “From this day forward”

Then, he changed it:

• I said, “For better, for worse”
• He said, “For better, for better”

Then he laughed. So did the bride. And the guests. Then he did it ‘right’.

We all want to have our married life be only “better and better.” But the whole point of vows is to say that, even when it’s not, when it is “for worse” I’ll be right there with you. Secretly, we wish that more for our spouse — that they will be there for me when I am going through tough times. After 25 years of marriage, I know that it goes both ways.

This happened aboard Odyssey Cruise at Navy Pier in Chicago. The ceremony is on the top deck while docked at Navy Pier — so that the only people on board are there for the wedding. The reception occurs while the boat is cruising Lake Michigan with magnificent views of Chicago.

Proposal at House of Blues — on stage, during a concert!

How did Ryan propose to Erica?

It was July 26, 2008. She had NO clue it was coming. There was a sold out show — that’s 1400 people — for Lucky Boys Confusion band at the House of Blues in Chicago. (They first met at this band’s concert at this location).

He tells her that he is working for the band. He was not — that day. But it’s the only way to not have her be suspicious when he got there 4 hours ahead of time.

He arranges to have his parents and 2 sisters to be at the concert. Let’s just say that his parents don’t normally go to these concerts. She is still clueless.

At the concert, she sees Ryan. He is wearing a sportscoat over a nice t-shirt — which is way unusual for him. Erica is in an opera box with the lead singer’s (Stubhy) wife. She had never been there before.

Ryan finds her. “Want to watch the concert from the side stage?” She is excited. She has never been there before either.

It’s the encore — the band is playing the first of 3 songs. Stubhy says to the crowd, “I want to introduce one of our best friends, who is moving to Arizona soon. This is one of his last House of Blues shows.”

The lead singer calls BOTH of them onto the stage. Erica did not want to go. Ryan prods her, it happens so fast, she is in the moment. They’re both on stage.

The microphone is given to Ryan. “What’s up, Chicago?!” The crowd goes crazy. He is glad they’re still into it.

He had a whole speech prepared. He feels nervous. It is really loud — there are 1400 screaming fans.

“Erica, there is something I want to say to you.” THAT is when she gets suspicious. He talks about the House of Blues —  how they met there, it’s her favorite place in the city, and she always wanted to get married there.” “I don’t think we can afford that but why done’ we make this the world’s largest engagement party?” The crowd goes wild.

He gets down on one knee. The crowd is louder.

“Erica, will you marry me?”

The crowd was so loud he could feel it in his stomach. That was so awesome.

Erica was in wide-eye shock. She could not speak. She nods yes and put her arms out for a hug. He picks her up and they kiss — on the stage.

With that, the encore continued.

This true story was shared at the wedding of Erica and Ryan at the wonderful Chandler’s in Schaumburg. As you can imagine, their guests loved it.

Customized Cake Toppers (from New York Times)

Another way to customize a reception — a cake topper that looks like you two!

The New York Times reported on Sunday, “Thanks to digital technology, cake toppers are more customizable than they have ever been. Plenty of Web sites, including etsy.com, offer an abundance of prices (from about $20 on up) and styles — realistic, traditional and quirky. They are, no matter the personality, the couple in miniature.”

When we got married 25 years ago, we had a generic couple atop our cake. Not sure a customized cake topper is worth the price but it is attention getting.

Read the entire article, with more links, here.

Flower girls — 17 months to 13 years

Last week, I had a 17 month old flower girl — Emma. This weekend, I had a wedding with two flower girls, ages 12 and 13. That’s as big of an age spread as it gets.

Emma’s father helped her get started. Her right hand was holding on to the ring bearer, Michael, 3.5 years old. Her dad tried to put the basket of flowers in her left hand. She did not want it and dropped it. Her dad tried again — to no avail. He wisely kept it. The two kids, looking adorable, made it to the second row when Emma stopped. William tugged at her to come forward. Thought she would come tumbling down. She did not. After they were both seated, I asked the audience to “rise and welcome the bride.”

The two older flower girls — Allison, 13, and Brenna, 12 — did not know each other before the wedding. But they were best friends throught the ceremony and reception. Allison’s brother was an usher, standing by the last row of chairs. When the flower girls walked by him, his sister threw some of the flowers at him! Those of us who saw it laughed. I had told the girls to throw extra flowers in front of me, that’s where Rebecca and Scott would be married. So, when they got to the front of the aisle, they turned over the basket so that all the remaining flowers fell on that spot! Everyone saw it and laughed. The exuberance of youth.

I recommend flower girl be at least 4 years old. Usually by the time they are 10, they think they are too old to be flower girls. 5 or 6 is the best — they’re old enough to understand directions but are still so cute.

Brides never get to see the flower girl or ring bearer — she is still hidden, awaiting her grand entrance. (An advantage of having a videographer).

Emma was the flower girl at Salvatore’s Restaurant in Chicago. Allison and Brenna were flower girls at Galleria Marchetti, in their beautiful courtyard, also in Chicago.

Cool summer weather — I liked it

Many have lamented what a cool and wet summer it has been.  As a guy who dresses all in black (well, one small white clerical collar) and stands in the sun to peform weddings, I liked the cool temperatures.

I’ve had several weddings where it was 70 degrees and overcast. Photographers like it, too. No one is squinting or sweating. (Well, the groom, groomsmen and I sweat; the bride and bridesmaids glisten and glow :>)